As I lay in bed, I dread having to announce again that I cannot post today. Or, should I say, yesterday.
The truth of it is, is that I am terrible at committing to things like this. It’s not that I’m bad at planning, or that I don’t like to do them. I’m just… sick. Really sick. And there is nothing I can do about that.
I don’t wish to get into the semantics of my illness at this point in time, but as I’m sure many of you have gathered, I suffer from depression (on top of everything else).
Now, my state of mind has been really bad lately. I’m to the point where I’m having to take things day by day. I have horrendous memories related to December and Christmas time. And the chronic pain from both my condition and the cold weather does nothing to help any of it.
But I have enjoyed doing Blogmas! I don’t want to stop! I just can’t do it… successfully at this point in time.
I’m not going to stop trying, I just need to accept that there are going to be days when I am well enough and happy enough to write, and there are going to be days when I’m not.
And I need to not feel bad about it.
I’m really sorry, though.
I should be back tomorrow (technically later today) for Blogmas day ten, if all goes well!
Sleep well everyone, xx